Aug 19 2034: Ranking hits all-time low - by lonzo on December 1st, 2017
The worst ranking in franchise history followed by the worst record stretch in franchise history. The drama between city and team owner was historic, the move from longtime franchise home Tulsa was historic, and now the lows are historic.
2 years ago when Lonzo took over the then Tulsa Cardinals, the writing was on the wall. The roster was old and very much overpaid, there was a major hole in the farm system with no prospects expected any time soon, oh and the money well had gone dry.
2 years later the finances are about the only good thing on this team, the roster is young and full of unproven players in an unfamiliar city. Time will tell if the decision to relocate is a permanent one. Reports are circulating that a fan petition to bring the team back to Tulsa is gaining steam. "This season without baseball has been awful, I thought we would be able to secure a new franchise by the start of the year but that has proven difficult" an unnamed city official said earlier.
Lonzo was asked by the media if a possible move back to Tulsa was in the cards, "Tulsa is a cool town, we had some disagreements, some very public disagreements, so that makes it hard, and we're here in St. Paul now and we're starting to see the team develop and become part of this community. This franchise has a great history in Tulsa and that will always be part of us, but I believe moving ahead, changes were necessary. We made the decision that mainly because of the lack of support from city officials and the downturn in game attendance that the move was necessary to the future success of the franchise."
Biggins McGee a Tulsa native was asked if he would welcome a Lonzo led Tulsa team back, "Dale yeah I would, I miss watching baseball down at the Ballpark at Tulsa. Many fans don't pay attention to the business side of the game but it's clear now how mismanaged the team was and that a correction was imminent. I just kinda hoped somehow it wouldn't be so messy. Sure enough it cost us our team."
Looks like today the *Bruins are staying put and the once bustling crowd in Tulsa is watching other teams play the game that once brought championships to their home.
Feb 19 2034: Duces Tulsa - by lonzo on October 13th, 2017
"After a long 2033 season the bombers have decided to leave Tulsa, OK for St. Paul, MN." was all a rep for team owner Lonzo had to say. Rumors were abound that the team would be relocating after new owner had continued clashes with local media and even city officials. Fans were scarce towards the end of the season, something that reportedly did not sit well with the new management. "From day one we've been battling a huge budget deficit, sure fans don't care about all that but the reality was that the sustainability of the organizations track was not possible, so we hit the reset button, in a big way" one anonymous front office executive explained in an interview after the initial announcement was made. As for Tulsa, its baseball future is uncertain but as for Lonzo and the newly minted Bruins, St. Paul awaits.
Aug 09 2033: Cohen Fired Effective Immediatly - by lonzo on September 13th, 2017
"He gone" Lonzo said at a press release this morning. "I called Roman this morning and told him that the teams performance over the past couple of months is straight embarrassing and he's fired" According to sources close to the situation GM Lonzo texted Cohen during the top half of the 9th inning Tuesday and said, "If the Catfish score another run this inning then you're fired!" Sure enough the Catfish scored not once but 3 times.
"Look, Cohen is my bro, but we had to downgrade him to a fan" said Lonzo after the 4am press conference. We highly doubt that Roman Cohen is a fan of the Lonzo led Tulsa Bombers.
The Bombers look to continue this disaster of a season tonight as they take on the El Paso Mustangs.
Jul 16 2033: Bombers Continue to Bomb - by lonzo on September 6th, 2017
Since taking ownership Lonzo's Tulsa Bombers are a historically pathetic 4-33. "This team is a joke man" said a season ticket holder who wished to remain anonymous. When pressed on the issue Lonzo said, "Look man, we had to turn this clubhouse on its side. Its a process but through this whole deal we're gonna gain new team leaders and captains...Tulsa must relearn how to win ballgames." The one upside to this disaster of a season is the fact that Tulsa's youngsters are getting plenty of experience on the major league stage, and it should be mentioned that the payroll cuts have more than balanced the budget. The team is finally making money again. "This will payoff in the long run" Lonzo said. He certainly has made a huge splash, a few enemies, and some significant political rivals since coming to Tulsa, but if things work out like Lonzo believes they will he will be a hero in this city.
Jun 08 2033: New Ownership Bolsters Lineup - by lonzo on August 27th, 2017
Tulsa baseball has a new look. After carrying the Cardinals namesake for the last decade or so, new owner Lonzo has brought back the original "Tulsa Bombers" name. Lonzo said, "I hate the cardinals, they ain't even no bird of prey". Fans had mixed reactions. "What the hell am I supposed to do with all this Tulsa Cardinals gear!?" one upset spectator said upon arriving to Tulsa Stadium in seemingly the wrong attire.
The name isn't the only, or biggest change for that matter. Day 1 Lonzo made 33 roster moves and also fired long-term manager Christian Agosto. Sources say Lonzo broke the news to him at a meet and greet 20 minutes before the first pitch. "Look this team is broke, we don't have the money to be paying managers millions of dollars." Or players for that matter as virtually every player over the age of 26 was cut. At this point the future of Tulsa baseball is uncertain at best